REAL STORIES

Age: 33
Gender: Female

I tried meth later on in my life at the age of 25. Before that it had been mostly alcohol and marijuana with occasional cocaine and shroom use. My husband started using first and I would watch him and wonder what the big deal was, I was happy with my weed so I didnšt really care, but it only took 4 months of watching him do it for me to want to also. At the time we had 2 children; physical abuse was also prevalent in the house. I didn't care if he beat me as long as I had meth to smoke after, sometimes even with him. He was also a dealer so we were smoking every day. Sometimes I would steal it from him when he was passed out from a 3-day binge. I was super skinny, at 5'10 and was 120 pounds. I had sores on my face from popping pimples that weren't even there. My brain was a mess from the drug use and the abuse, it was like I was slow.That went on for almost 2 years until I decided to leave him, tired of neglecting my children and being irritable at them and myself, of the abuse and bruises, of my family being ashamed of me. My husband disappeared and my children were taken away from me. For me that was my whole world falling in, I had been a mother since the age of 17. I asked my worker what I had to do to get them back, she replied "treatment". That was the the beggining of a whole new life without the use of drugs and alcohol. I went to Oahu, to a culturally centered program. It was hard at first because I had used almost every day for 2 years straight. I went through harsh withdrawals and depression. But with the help of my counselor, I did my time learned how to live life again, how to forgive my husband and myself and be a good, whole person. When I got my children back, it was worth all the hard work and time (1 year). I have since reunited with my husband after learning that he to had gotten clean and worked on himself, it has been 5 years since and I am 6 years clean next month. I went to college and am working towards my certification and masters degree in substance abuse counseling. I am currently and have been for the past 3 years a substance abuse counselor and work with the youth population. My children are now 16, 11 and 5 and we are living life on life's terms and I have shown them and others in my community and family that people can change and stay strong. They are my world and I will NEVER risk losing them again.  

» Back to Real Stories